Guidance of the Month: September 2006
Q: Please give me a meditation on attitudinal healing — especially forgiveness. I’m just beginning to see that I need to bring more forgiveness into my life in order to be happy.
A: “Here is a meditation that will bring you what you seek:
When I look at the ways in which I have been less then forgiving with myself over the years, I begin to understand why I am unable to forgive others. I have only to look at my own need for forgiveness to realize that when I withhold it from others, they are hurt, and I also hurt myself because I have not opened my heart.
My ability to forgive myself is growing as I practice it daily, but I know I must remember to do so regularly or I will lapse into my old, out-dated way of attacking myself for not doing things perfectly or understanding other people’s needs completely.
I now know that I am too hard on myself and it is that unforgiving attitude which keeps me separate from myself and from the happiness I seek. The punishment, the blame, has got to stop altogether, for who do I wish to be if not a loving, guilt-free, forgiving person who attracts people with the same qualities to her? And how can I become that person if I can’t forgive myself even for the minor flaws that really are only signs of my human imperfection?
When I get up in the morning, I will remind myself that I am a worthy, perfectly imperfect human being who deserves all the love and success and freedom from fear that anyone could ever deserve. And that by practicing that attitude in little ways today toward others, I am also giving the same love to myself. And vice versa. For how can I give love and forgiveness unceasingly to others if I have not given myself those gifts first?
Only when I am able to go through a day holding no grudges, letting go of all anger soon after I experience it, and seeing only the light, the good in others as well as myself, will I know that I am beginning to get out of my own way. And that will mark a new beginning for my life.”