Diane’s Blog

Q:  What do I need to look at in terms of outdated or distorted beliefs in order to manifest what I want in life?

A:  Be prepared to listen to all voices from within your heart that feel isolated, lost, or frightened about being left behind.  Hear their responses to your movement toward light and love, and honor their need for more time spent in the light of your awareness.  This will include the fear you still maintain of your own voice and its power. 

You need not be concerned any longer about your effect on others — it has little to do with your own large spirit — more to do with the areas in others that are still small and crying out for attention of their own.  Those who respond negatively to your increasingly powerful presence, then, would do best to look within themselves for answers to their feelings of anger and worthlessness.  You are not responsible. 

Do not feel the need to focus on or dwell upon your areas of lack except when you hear a little voice asking you to do so.  Then shed all the light at your disposal on this needy part of yourself, and allow it to come up and out — give it positive attention, nurture it, and let it go its own way.  That is the best you can do for yourself in terms of personal growth and the shedding of old outdated beliefs. 

 Allow your love of Self and of God to comfort these less-developed areas of yourself rather than berating and chiding yourself for being a part of them and they a part of you.  OWN THEM truly; allow for their existence right next to your most highly developed areas and they will begin to shine also, reflecting the light and generosity of spirit you afford them.  Teach yourself, in other words, how to love and be loved; your Higher Self knows no favorites in terms of the fragments of the whole. 

All your elements of design are equally valued and loved by your creator.  If you are truly growing toward godhood, emulate that way, that inclusiveness.  Start with yourself.”

Q:  What can I do in a concrete way to give deeper meaning to a new year in which I commit myself to my higher purpose?

A:  “You can sit, and with eyes closed, picture the coming year and the events you wish to see transpire, especially as related to your higher purpose.  (NOTE: Those of you who aren’t yet clear about that purpose, ask yourself what would you like for it to be, letting go of any practical considerations)

Then picture yourself and how you wish to BE in that year — what qualities do you wish to project more, and which ones do you wish to let go of?  Write these impressions down in a way that will be a marker for you in years to come.  Keeping them in a journal is a good way to do this.  You will not only see these things unfold as they occur, but you will remember how you ushered them in this year. 

Do not forget to include your prayers and wishes for others in your life, living and dead.  You may even wish to draw a picture or create a symbol that will be a touchstone for you throughout the year, one that will evoke your intention for that year every time you gaze at it or hold it in your hand.  Remember to give a little time — a few moments — just to loving yourself and the wonderful, loving person you are now and are every day becoming. 

Never leave your love of Self out, or you will not have created a complete picture of your reality.  YOU are the center from whom all love, all creativity, all wisdom and energy that is life-supporting flows.”

Q:  What do I need to do or focus on in order to ease my concern about my financial situation?

A:   “Your financial situation is not as dire as you think.  You have only to look within to realize this.  You are headed toward a new reality, are you not?  And this reality creates along with it unlimited opportunities for financial gain.  This is the nature of abundance.  It is not a separate category, as you and most others think.  It is about abundance and that is all it is. 

 Your continuing worry has nothing to do with the money, then, but is about bringing that abundance into your life.  Until recently you did not know this and so tried to evolve your money-making abilities by focusing on “Money-making ideas.”  This never works, or if it does, not for long.  Again this is not about money.  It is about the energy behind what you think of as material wealth.  And that is what you are now bringing into your life — the energy of abundant life.  

Why worry about money when you could be focusing instead on how abundant the universe is?  Why be frightened about bill paying when you could use that time to focus on creating new beliefs that support your unlimited ability to create what ever you desire in life? 

Do you not yet see that every thought you turn toward worry robs you of another step forward toward that money?  It is time and effort that could be spent creating something quite different, you see — creating the very thing that you are taking precious time to un-create by worrying about not having.  Does that make sense to you? 

So, in order to let go of your financial worries, you must first and foremost STOP THE WORRYING THOUGHTS.  They are only creating lack of the very abundance you seek.  Instead, every time your thoughts turn to worry, tell yourself, “No need to go there.  I am now creating all the abundance I could ever need.  I am now open to receive all the abundance the universe is offering me, even if I don’t always believe I deserve it.” 

Then let go and continue on with your business.  Do not dwell on this and do not send yourself messages in other ways that translate into lack.  Keep an eye out for these messages, which sometimes show up as comments you make to others about your “lack of money” or “can’t afford” or “I can only pay you in installments” and on and on.  Only become aware of how often you make these statements and you will begin to let go of your need to be a person of “no means. 

It is only your ego’s insistence on “being in charge” that is preventing the breakthrough to the “abundance” level.  Allow, let go, and give thanks.  That is your “Ticket to Ride.”

Q:  How am I not allowing myself to experience more abundance?

A:  “You are now ‘hatching’ your abundance through the opening of your heart, for that is the way always — through loving, expansive feelings for self and others.  You have held this state at arm’s length for most of your life only because it frightened the part of you who believed that to give was to experience lack and loss.  This is the poverty mentality applied to the heart. 

Only those who give freely know how false this state is — how it is an illusion.  When you give — of your time, your words, your belongings, your self — you actually expand your self and all that you touch.  You become a more expanded version of your self – one who knows that there is never lack as a result of giving, and that you must always come back to giving to self.

That is where it begins and ends.  Without love of self, all other giving is shallow and ultimately dries up, having no firm base upon which to rest.  You need only look to your own emotional needs for now, for that is where your abundance begins.  How do you still deny yourself emotionally of all you have to give in terms of support, love, forgiveness, and acceptance just for being?  Not doing.  Being. 

You still have a daily agenda that often requires certain specific goals or actions of yourself.  Failing to execute these more than adequately sets you up for inner punishment by the self who criticizes and judges. 

That part of you has relaxed her grip to a great extent, it is true, but she still dominates, and must be coaxed and supported in her neediness so that she will no longer need to withhold love — the love that you need in order to experience your abundance. 

You can discover how she still operates by simply bringing a bit more awareness to your everyday interactions with yourself and note the voice being used.  How do you speak to yourself?  Would you speak to a close friend in the same way?  That is how to recognize and step aside from the need to contract rather than expand.”              

Q:  Why is it so important to “separate” from my parents in order to establish my own path in life, and how do I do this?

A:  “You need to assert your own hard-won point of view because theirs is so limited and limiting in scope that you would truly never find out who you were meant to be.  This can be accomplished only by breaking away entirely from their rule, and that entails seeing your world separately — as separate from — theirs.  And accepting that only your way is valid for you. 

This means strongly but diplomatically rejecting your parents’ ideas about who you should be, where you should go, with whom you should or should not associate, and what money to spend — on a daily basis — whenever such matters arise.  Be firm in your stance, and your stance is this –

‘ I know I am doing things (seeing things, creating relationships with people) differently than you do or you think is right, but that is who I am, and I cannot force myself to be like you anymore.  I did that for many years, and I was unhappy.  It also made me unhappy — even angry and resentful — with you, because I blamed you for expecting me to be a certain way. 

I finally learned that you were not to blame — but that also meant taking responsibility for my own actions, and once I really started doing that, I began to see just how different my real needs and thoughts and beliefs were from yours.  And I began to feel okay about that, rather than beat myself up about being different, as I always had in the past.  Always. 

 I thought I was a bad person whenever I didn’t meet your expectations or assumptions of what I should be doing in work, in school, in my personal life.  Nothing seemed to ever really please you unless I somehow did exactly what you had in mind at that moment for me.  Then I was suddenly a good, intelligent person who “did the right thing.”  The only problem was, it wasn’t necessarily the right thing for me, and I wound up being unhappy again very shortly, because I knew I couldn’t keep up the pretense of being that person you had approved of. 

I can function very adequately in the world now even without your validation, because I have learned that the only real, lasting validation comes from my own heart.  I have learned to forgive myself now, whenever I feel I hurt someone or could have done better, or made a poor choice.  Because I know I am learning from my mistakes and these lessons are just what I need to help make me a more loving, wise, and worthwhile person.’ 

This is how you can communicate your separateness to your parents in whatever way seems appropriate.  You can only win with this approach, as you are taking a non-blaming, assertive, positive position that does not focus on any shortcomings of your parents, but on your own needs and growing ability to get them met.”

Q:  Please give me a meditation on attitudinal healing — especially forgiveness.  I’m just beginning to see that I need to bring more forgiveness into my life in order to be happy.

A:  “Here is a meditation that will bring you what you seek:

When I look at the ways in which I have been less then forgiving with myself over the years, I begin to understand why I am unable to forgive others.  I have only to look at my own need for forgiveness to realize that when I withhold it from others, they are hurt, and I also hurt myself because I have not opened my heart. 

My ability to forgive myself is growing as I practice it daily, but I know I must remember to do so regularly or I will lapse into my old, out-dated way of attacking myself for not doing things perfectly or understanding other people’s needs completely. 

I now know that I am too hard on myself and it is that unforgiving attitude which keeps me separate from myself and from the happiness I seek.  The punishment, the blame, has got to stop altogether, for who do I wish to be if not a loving, guilt-free, forgiving person who attracts people with the same qualities to her?  And how can I become that person if I can’t forgive myself even for the minor flaws that really are only signs of my human imperfection? 

When I get up in the morning, I will remind myself that I am a worthy, perfectly imperfect human being who deserves all the love and success and freedom from fear that anyone could ever deserve.  And that by practicing that attitude in little ways today toward others, I am also giving the same love to myself.  And vice versa.  For how can I give love and forgiveness unceasingly to others if I have not given myself those gifts first? 

Only when I am able to go through a day holding no grudges, letting go of all anger soon after I experience it, and seeing only the light, the good in others as well as myself, will I know that I am beginning to get out of my own way.  And that will mark a new beginning for my life.”

Q:  If I choose to pursue bankruptcy, how can I tell if that decision is based on fear or love?

A:  “Your decision will be right for you if you allow your heart, not your mind to lead you.  If you choose to follow this course of action, will you be doing so to escape fear or move toward love of Self?  Can you see this action as a way of informing your mind of what it needs to take into consideration, and leave the heart out entirely?  If so, you will need to look more closely. 

 Why would you choose to take an action which would undermine your faith in your heart — your Higher Self?  If you see this as a move towards stability — away from chaos, that may explain to you why it seems wise, but does it truly suit your deeper needs? 

 Ask yourself if you would pursue bankruptcy under less pressured circumstances.  The answer is fairly obvious.  Now ask yourself if you would pursue it only under extreme pressure to do so.  Then ask — where is this pressure originating — from without or within?  If you can truthfully say “without” then perhaps you have a case.  If, however, the pressure you are feeling is mainly coming from within, then there is only one point of origin, and that is Ego.  Spirit does not “pressure” — it guides, and gently, if firmly. 

 Do you believe you have only one exit door from your present situation?  If so, then you need to reconsider and allow for the unknown to be factored in.  YOU CANNOT KNOW CONSCIOUSLY ALL THE POSSIBILITIES AWAITING YOU IN EVERY MOMENT.  You only think you can, and do.  That is where most humans go wrong; by thinking they have all the answers, and choosing the most “logical” among those.  This is backwards.  You can only look at what you know, and then allow for millions of other possible outcomes to occur as well.  Your solution will more likely be among the unknown than the known.  Is this not often the way — at least when you remain open? 

 There is higher wisdom at work here, so it often seems confusing.  You are not used to seeing and thinking and feeling in these ways.  They are the ways of Spirit, not ego, and that is the nature of the shift you are now making.  All of this will eventually become second nature to you.  For now it is foreign and as such is slightly suspect — perhaps greatly suspect, based as it is on much that cannot be perceived readily by the five senses. 

You are becoming a multi–sensory human.  Remember this as you continue to bump up against the old ways — the old beliefs.  They are too limited and limiting for the life you have chosen to open to, so now you must make new choices daily to align with that new way of being.  Otherwise it will simply be more of the same. 

 The bottom line is to see beyond the demands of ego to the needs of Spirit.  You will only know your truth by leaving ego behind.”

Q:  “What are the lessons I am meant to learn from what seems to be a deepening rift between my parents and I?”

A:  You are indeed going through a difficult time, feeling the loss of the two people you believed would somehow always be there — regardless of the bad feelings which seemed more and more frequent between you.  You can see this as a new chapter — a new beginning in your life – one that you needed in order to become the person you planned to be so long ago.  Without this dark night of the soul in your life at this time, you would not be as likely to find in yourself the qualities you needed to develop in order to be that loving, lovable, wise, yet saddened person who will always remember the illusions of her childhood with some pain — although in time it will be more of a memory than a feeling.

You are now aligning with your heart in a healthy way, and allowing it to lead a little more often rather than refusing to hear its pleas above the din of the ego — the “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” and “musts” and all the requirements placed on yourself to be a “good person.”  You are now at the beginning of the new chapter in which you will come to recognize that the only road toward happiness and peace of mind and becoming the person you have always hoped to be, both in your eyes and those of others, is to allow your heart to lead — not the ego voice that will always pronounce loudly the need for doing things perfectly and in the correct way at the proper time.

Your spirit is big, and it is only waiting to be heard by you on a daily basis so that it can begin to lead you toward the life that you have always dreamed of, but had thought unattainable.  You can obtain it by focusing on being with yourself daily in a more forgiving, allowing way with no instructions, no rules.  These are no longer helpful to you — they are the outdated beliefs of your childhood — the structure you clung to when everything around you looked like it would sink and fall away at any moment.  You imposed rigid structure on your life long ago to protect yourself from the chaos you felt inside growing up in your parents’ home.  You were sensitive and knew there was something wrong always in the home — yet often turned it inward blaming yourself and taking on too much responsibility for your age.  This helped you to cope with your fears.

Now you are just beginning to examine some of these self-imposed limitations and you will need to spend time with your self just observing and wondering which beliefs about yourself and about how life “should” be at any given moment are still worth hanging on to.  Which can you now safely allow to fall away?

As you begin to do so, and that is the major reason for this lesson in your life, you will begin to feel a new freedom, a lightness you have never known, and you will for the first time see that you are so much more than you ever gave yourself credit for being.  So much more important to the universe in terms of just allowing yourself to be the person you planned to be in this life so many, many years ago.

Love your self always, my dear.  That is the way as well as the goal.